Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Happiness Soldiers

“Well-behaved women rarely make history.”
Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

We are the first generation of women happiness soldiers. We march in the front row and claim what is rightfully ours and we want to be content in the process. We demand equality in body, mind and spirit. And think about how much we have already accomplished! What great inspiring women can we see marching ahead of us? Oprah who showed us that all you need is compassion and a first name to built an empire. Hillary Clinton who refuses anyone to tell her what do to even if it is the entire Democratic party. I love that, if I ever get to meet her, I have a feeling we will get along just fine. What about Madeleine Albright, Barbara Boxer and German Chancellor Alexandra Merkel? There so many strong women who have paved the way for us. Some do it quietly in our communities and some more openly. Unfortunately they are not given the same attributes that men are given for achieving the same. A men is tough and a good negotiator. A women is trying too hard, unfeminine and perhaps a b…... I don’t care, I have not cared what others think of me for a while and I don’t want you to care either. Do what must be done and as we push forward and pave the road from a single lane road into a four lane freeway for our daughters we will succeed in the end, together.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Website is progressing

Just looked at the beta version of my new website. I am starting to feel the urge to go back out there and do something. The time off is great and I needed it for my mental and physical health. God bless all stay at home moms. It just is not for me, I like playing with the boys way too much. Motherhood is great, don't get me wrong but there just is nothing that comes close to the satisfaction when you can see what you do. Appreciation in hard cash is definitely important. Off to a quick run and then back to writing.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Finding Dulcinea

Just been interviewed by a fabulous woman named Isabel Cowles. She writes for FindingDulcinea.com. Stay tuned and I will update you when and where it is published. Isabel generously allowed me to use some of the interview in the form of an audio recording on my upcoming website.

Other then that, I am still writing like a maniac today. During my research I came across a Professor for Communication in Milwaukee who believes that "Men are from North Dakota and Women are from South Dakota. I love that quote. In essence the idea is that the way men and women communicate are not as different as John Gray said in his famous Mars/Venus book. Neighboring states are much better then different planets. There is hope for all of us.

What do I think about this? I believe that we have a desired outcome in intimate communication but in our working world it isn't so. In my love relationship I want to talk about feelings. Whereas in business men and women communicate very much alongside the same lines. This entire communication issue will be explored in my communication chapter. It is very exciting to me. Something new and different.

Monday, July 7, 2008

The four steps explained:

Explain the steps:
Your first step is to be honest with yourself and take 100% responsibility for your life. Put 100% in what you do as that is everything you got. Don’t give 150% (as that is mathematically impossible and will wear you out) and nothing less is sufficient either. You are where you are today because of the decisions you made. Which were based on the circumstances of your life but nevertheless your decisions led to this point. It is neither good nor bad so take a good look at where you are. What would you say if you where your best friend and you would look at yourself from the outside? What would you see? Don’t judge, just look and see. This is the first step, to KNOW.

Your second step is to believe that what has happened up to here must mean something. All your little bits and pieces here and there, accomplishments, career elements, relationships and hits and misses amount to you. Don’t talk bad about it, don’t throw yourself or anyone else under the bus, just accept it for what it is. You would not be who you are, perfect you that is, if you did not have these experiences. This includes the fights with your Mom, your kid’s hating you, you failed first marriage, your debt on your credit card, your overbite and your love handles. It encompasses that you got fired from that job for being late one to many times, downsized, transferred and your urge to gossip too much. This is the second step, to ACCEPT.

Your third step is to take a very deep relaxing breath. It could be better but it could be a lot worse. If you have never been in a natural disaster or haven’t lost most or everything - consider yourself blessed. Remind yourself consciously that you have it pretty good. You got here in one piece. Bruised and battered but in one piece. That means something and it is good. You have stamina and are a lot stronger than you thought you could ever be. Be proud of that, think about what you have overcome and mastered entirely on your own. The chances that you will be facing another big storm or set out for a great smooth sailing experience are at about 100%. There is no reason to worry about that today or to freak out about what could be. Your life will continue to change. Today is an Ok day, maybe today is a great day. This is your third step, to RELAX.

Your fourth step is to remind yourself of where you are today. You have family and friends that deeply care about you. Even if you don’t like them right now or have been in an argument. Life is good in essence. Find the positive, half full side of everything you do. Remind yourself that you are not in the Olympics and you don’t need to get to your finish line in under 10 seconds. Your life is a journey with hills and valleys and stops. Trust that you will know when to hurry, when to slow down and when to rest. Worry about what happens when it does happen. Spending your nights tossing and turning about something that hasn’t occurred yet is a colossal waste of time and worst it might attract negative things. Worry about your bills only once every two weeks. When you need to figure out how to pay them. Don’t ruin your other 13 days. Be in the moment more and enjoy your journey. This is your fourth step, to LIVE.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Chapter after Chapter

Yesterday and today I have been writing like a maniac. Thank God I am finally feeling better. The last two months have been such a roller coaster as far as my health is concerned. Perhaps the sitting on the couch and the many hours of resting were what I needed to formulate my concept.

I'd like to get feedback. Lot's of it. The concept needs to be tested and I want to make sure that I am not writing anything that is complicated and sounds convoluted. ego-RHYTHM is positive and gentle concept.

While I write for women, if you are a guy visiting this page - welcome. You can give me feedback, too. After all I want you to buy a copy of this book and give it to the woman-who-wants-it-all, your girlfriend or wife. You will score big points if you can show her how to get it all, too.